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never mind

Everybody knows the Ford jokes but do you know what Ford stands for backward? Driver returned on foot.

Mopar - My Old Pig Ain't Running. Mostly Old Parts And Rust.

How about Hyundai? Have Your Uneducated Nincompoop Drive Away Immediately.

F.O.R.D.
Found On Road Dead
First On Race Day

P.O.N.T.I.A.C.
Poor Old Nincompoop Thinks It's A Cadillac

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At work we have a mix of Chevy and ford trucks. One day a guy ran out of gas on parkway few miles from town. We went and flat towed it back to the shop. I said we should take a pic cause it WAS a CHEVY pulling a FORD.

Parkmower said:

At work we have a mix of Chevy and ford trucks. One day a guy ran out of gas on parkway few miles from town. We went and flat towed it back to the shop. I said we should take a pic cause it WAS a CHEVY pulling a FORD.

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Nice i like ford but I also put down Chevy jokes


CHEVROLET
Cracked
Heads
Every
Valve
Rattles
Oil
Leeks
Exhaust
Toots



CHEVY
Can
Hear
Every
Valve
Yell



CHEVROLET
Can't
Haul,
Every
Valve
Rusts
Oil,
Leaks
Every
Time

D.O.D.G.E.

Dumb Old Dimwit Gets an Egg


K.I.A.

Killed In Action

chobbs1957 said:

F.O.R.D.
Found On Road Dead
First On Race Day

P.O.N.T.I.A.C.
Poor Old Nincompoop Thinks It's A Cadillac

Sent from my iPad using LMF

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Freaking
Old
Rebuilt
Dodge:laughing:

I and a partner had been in the marine transport business years back.
Our small trucks were mostly Ford diesels. My partner brought home a 93 diesel Dodge 3500 from FL that he thought was a steal, it turned out to be a lemon, we got rid of it after 4 months.
He decided to buy a new 95 GMC 3500 diesel, it punched a connecting rod thru the engine block at 125,000 miles still on warranty. This happened in west Texas and it took 11 months before we got this truck back with a new engine. This truck went away shortly after.
Of the seven Ford F350, one 450 and one 550 diesels that we had, the lowest miles was 430,000 miles and the highest miles was 700,000 when we got rid of them. These trucks were years 1983 thru 1990. We also had gas Suburbans during this time and we stocked GM big blocks and transmissions as we only got 70,000 to 80,000 miles before they had to be replaced. We did have maintenance problems with the Fords, unavoidable with high mileage and several idiot drivers, but we kept them going fairly reasonably.
Our big rigs were Mack, Peterbilt, and International.
We sold the business in 2001.
Just throwing this into the "joke" pile!!!:laughing::biggrin::smile:

I've driven 4 fords in my lifetime. 1948 coupe-pre owned, 1959 pickumup truck-pre owned, 1965 pickumup truck-pre owned, 1988 pickumup truck-purchased new. All except the 1965, I pushed more miles than I drove them.

This wasn't the 48 coupe. This one is a 47.:laughing:

SeniorCitizen said:

I've driven 4 fords in my lifetime. 1948 coupe-pre owned, 1959 pickumup truck-pre owned, 1965 pickumup truck-pre owned, 1988 pickumup truck-purchased new. All except the 1965, I pushed more miles than I drove them.

This wasn't the 48 coupe. This one is a 47.:laughing:

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A 1951 Caddy coupe was my daily driver for several years in the early 70s. I also had a 52 Coupe Deville and a 53 Coupe Deville for a short time along with a 1929 Studebaker Touring car. In 1973 we adopted two girls and later that year a son arrived and for some reason all my nice big toys went away!!!:frown::frown::frown:
I then got into 4 wheel drive vehicles, Jeeps, Scouts and a Land Rover. I plowed snow with the Jeeps and one Scout so they somewhat paid for themselves.
My fave was a 49 Merc 4 door that I had in 1960/61. It went away when I joined the US Navy in 1961.:frown::frown::frown:
Oh well!!!!!

FORDS

Well, I might as well throw my two-cents in. I come from a Ford family. The first one I remember was a '38 pickup my father owned when I was a kid. It was already old by that time. Then came a '57 Ranchero followed by a '59 Ranchero, then in the early 60's he got into Econolines. I learned to drive in a 1928 Model A, but that was a real fluke as it was nearly 30 years old the first time I drove it. Mother had a series of Nash's. The first was an Ambassador she had for a while and then several Ramblers, but eventually she had Fords too. I had a couple Ford Falcons in the early and mid 60's, then joined the Sub Service in 1964, had a '68 Mustang 2+2, but had to sell it as the local bank wouldn't let me take it to Hawaii, so I bought a '69 428 cid Cobra-Jet.. Now that was a ridiculous car to own in Hawaii! You'd be on the other side of the island before you could get out of second gear!! The Navy shipped it (and me) back stateside to California where I discovered that I couldn't drive it from San Diego to Arizona on I-8 as there weren't enough gas stations to fill it up at! Then gas prices went to $0.499/gallon for high test and I thought I couldn't possibly afford that! So I traded it in on a 1971 Datsun pickup with a 1600 cc engine!! Now that was a change in pace, let me tell you!!! Put a cab-over camper on the Datsun and used it until I got out of the Navy in 1974.

I joined the family business at that time and got back into Fords. Had an Escort and an old pickup. The company had Ford vans. We kept them all about ten years each, but by that time the salt on the roads in Maine would devour the metal work and we'd trade them in for new ones. I think we went through around 20 different Ford vans and never really had anything seriously go wrong with any of them. You can say what you want about Fords, but they treated me well for most of my life. Regular maintenance and most any vehicle will last as long as you want.. 'Cept maybe Dodge, they made some real junk for a good many years. I know that they have done some serious advertising for the last few years, trying to convince folks that they now build a good truck, but it's going to take a l-o-n-g time to convince us old guys that they have really changed. The old saying: "Once bitten, twice shy" comes to mind...

Sorry, no jokes . . . Well, here's a couple I didn't see on here: Ford - "Fix Or Repair Daily"... GMC - "Garage Man's Companion"

Ta-Da-Ta-Da . . . That's all folks....

Roger B

I spent my career working in a fire station. There were constant jabs and jokes thrown around about trucks, cars, ATV's, boat motors, what have ya. I recall one guy proudly proclaiming that he had bought a new fishing boat. One of the other boat enthusiasts asked him what brand the motor was and he told him that there was only one brand worth buying and that was Mercury. They went back and forth about Evinrude vs. Mercury. Pretty comical. The first day he took out his new boat, the motor started on fire out in the middle of the lake. He never lived that one down. That same guy used to get ribbed by the Chevy truck guys because he bought a new Ford. After about 3 months of ownership, he went out to start it at the end of the shift--would not fire. He called a wrecker to have it towed. Just to add insult to injury, I asked the wrecker driver what brand of truck he towed the most. His answer--" That's easy-Ford!" Oh yeah, all in fun, of course.

Everybody was fair game, including me. One day I showed up at work with my brand new Harley-Davidson motorcycle that I paid for by working a second job. I heard the same Harley jokes over and over again (Hardley-Ableson, Chrome don't get you home, What does a Harley and a Hoover have in common?--They both have a dirt bag attached to them, ectcetera, on and on). Many times when I went out to ride it home, I would find a little pile of oil-dry conveniently scattered under the motor. That was a clever little trick. Lots of fun! There are times when I miss those days. All that male bravado and laughter!!

2smoked said:

There are times when I miss those days. All that male bravado and laughter!!

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Smoked!

Don't give up the "Good Old Days" to easily.... Next week I'm headed for New Orleans where a bunch of us that served aboard the USS Sailfish SS-572 back in 1969-1970 are all getting together to celebrate "All that male bravado and laughter" Some of us haven't seen each other since 1970... Ought to be a wild-@ss time! Nothing like a bunch of septuagenarians acting like they were 20 again!! Deep diving, death defying, one and all.........

Roger

Roger B said:

Smoked!

Don't give up the "Good Old Days" to easily.... Next week I'm headed for New Orleans where a bunch of us that served aboard the USS Sailfish SS-572 back in 1969-1970 are all getting together to celebrate "All that male bravado and laughter" Some of us haven't seen each other since 1970... Ought to be a wild-@ss time! Nothing like a bunch of septuagenarians acting like they were 20 again!! Deep diving, death defying, one and all.........

Roger

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Just a follow up to this post: We all survived our New Orleans reunion.. I would love to be able to say that New Orleans will never be the same, but that would be an out-and-out lie. New Orleans is a resilient old girl and it would take more than a couple dozen "OLD" sub sailors to make an impression on her... Try as they might. Our days of turning a town upside down are far behind us... But, oh well, we still have the memories..

Zero Bubble..

Roger B